zzz

i'm depressed w my perpetual workload,
and i'm always so tired and sleepy,
that i wish i'll just drop dead and die.

i'm upset that after going through endless readings,
summaries, edited summaries,
i still have many readings and summaries to do.

i'm frustrated that i've not been able to progress much for primate's report
and that i've not started on forensics report cos i've got no idea what i wanna write on.
and i'm fucking stressed about everything on top of everything else,
and that exams are inching close,
and i, as usual, am not prepared for it.
meaning that i might, as usual, not complete the chpts that are required for exams. again.
despite swearing tt i will, over and over again.

i'm pissed off with myself.
i dont seem to learn from my mistakes,
and it seems that no matter what knowledge and insights i gain,
it doesnt seem to change me into a better, more disciplined person.

and i'm feeling like a schizophrenic,
fighting to think positive,
when all i see is darkness.
hypocrite.