[ don't leave me * ]

you're my favorite hello,
and my hardest goodbye.

parties drain me.
they make me shrivel up with emptiness at the end of the day.
it started well.
i could almost convince myself.
as in,
i almost forgot that i was putting a mask on.

but. that happened.
and you dont just break down at parties.
so i started putting on more masks.

after so much effort,
it still isnt enough.
i just dont know how to improve anymore.

i dont know why it's here.
but it's everywhere.
i cant...
need chewie therapy. but it's too late now.
i tried to talk to someone else.
but she thinks that i should control all of this.

if i could.
i wouldnt be crashing now.
so you mean for others, it's go ahead and pursue.
but for me, cos it's wrong. so it's stop and control yourself?
cos it's wrong?

take me, don't leave me *