[ rock bottom * ]

if i told you a secret,
would you not tell a soul?
would you hold it and keep it alive?
cos it's burning a hole.
and i cant get to sleep,
and i cant live alone in this lie.. *

you're still here. constantly.
at first, there was like a 1000 little yous running around.
messing w my brain.
now, you're hiding.
but you're still there.
no wait. im the one who's repressing all of the little x.
denial. and pretending that i dont care.

it's you.
it's your msg im waiting for.
it's you im waiting for to appear online.
it's you im waiting to see.

but after this entry,
im gg back to my pretend land.
the place where i dont miss you.
where i dont ache.
where i can breathe.
where i dont have to hide.

but im hiding.
im desperate to hide from some ppl.
i just dont know how to face them without my happy mask on.

it's tiring to be hiding.