happy mom's day

i received this many years ago.
when i was still a rebellious teenager.
and everything my parents did,
either "restricted my freedom/denied my individual rights/invaded my privacy/was done without considering my feelings",
or just plain annoying/irritating/damn freaking long-winded/making mountains out of molehills and etc.

then cedar had this super teen camp.
it was by that adam (?) person.
sorry adam-or-what's-his-name,
it's in the middle of the night,
and i havent been thinking much since exams ended.
i cant recall your name.
=x

he wrote that book.
i cant rmb the title too.
i'll check tmr.

then the other guy,his partner,
told us a very emotional story of how his wife gave birth to his son.
and the things she does/chooses not to do in favour of her son/cannot do, after child birth.

and that got me thinking about my mom.
the things she did for me.
the things she gave up for me.
and the things she cannot do because of me.

and i felt so guilty.
because i know she worries about me all the time,
and i always dismissed her worries as a nuisance.

and then he shared his story of his father.
they had a bad relationship,
and he never forgave his dad.
but then his dad died suddenly.
he cries everytime he tells the camp students this.

i've a bad relationship with my dad too.
i fixed the mom part,
because i find it much easier to communicate w my mom.
but im still trying to fix things with my dad.
i dont know how to though,
with my anti-mcp sentiments,
and the communication barrier,
and we're both stubborn.
and. well.
he's a man of few words,
and in his presence, im reduced to a girl with few words too.
because ive got nth to say.
plus, even if i do,
by the time ive got it all translated into cantonese and chinese,
the chance to speak is gone.

ok, digressed.
it's mom's day.

the more solid the bond becomes,
the more afraid i am of losing her.
i know i cannot function without her.


When you were 1 yr old, she fed you and bathed you.
You thanked her by crying all night long.

When you were 2 yrs old, she taught you to walk,
you thanked her by running away when she called.

When you were 3 yrs old, she made all your meals with love.
You thanked her by tossing your plate on the floor.

When you were 4 yrs old, she gave you some crayons.
You thanked her by colouring the dining room table.

When you were 5 yrs old, she dressed you for the holidays.
You thanked her by plopping into the nearest (missing word?)

When you were 6 yrs old, she walked you to school.
You thanked her by screaming, "I'm not going!"

When you were 7 yrs old, she bought you a baseball.
You thanked her by throwing it through the next-door-neighbor's window.

When you were 8 yrs old, she handed you an ice-cream.
You thanked her by dripping it all over your lap.

When you were 9 yrs old, she paid for piano lessons.
You thanked her by never even bothering to practice.

When you were 10 yrs old, she drove you all day,
from soccer to gymnastic to one birthday party after another.
You thanked her by jumping out of the car and never looking back.

When you were 11 yrs old, she took you and your friends to the movies.
You thanked her by asking to sit in a different row.

When you were 12 yrs old, she warned you not to watch certain TV shows.
You thanked her by waiting until she left the house.

When you were 13 yrs old, she suggested a haircut.
You thanked her by telling her she had no taste.

When you were 14 yrs old, she paid for a month stay at summer camp.
You thanked her by forgetting to write a single letter.

When you were 15 yrs old, she came home from work looking for a hug.
You thanked her by having your bedroom door locked.

When you were 16 yrs old, she taught you how to drive her car.
You thanked her by taking it every chance you could.

When you were 17 yrs old, she was expecting an important call.
You thanked her by being on the phone all night.

When you were 18 yrs old, she cried at your high school graduation.
You thanked her by staying out partying until dawn.

When you were 19 yrs old, she paid for your college tuition,
drove you to campus, carried your bags.
You thanked her by saying goodbye outside the dorm
so you wouldn't be embarrassed in front of your friends.

When you were 20 yrs old, she asked whether you were seeing someone.
You thanked her by saying, "It's none of your business."

When you were 21 yrs old, she suggested certain careers for your future.
You thanked her by saying, "I don't want to be like you!"

When you were 22 yrs old, she hugged you at your college graduation.
You thanked her by asking whether she could pay for a trip to Europe.

When you were 23 yrs old, she gave you furniture for your first apartment.
You thanked her by telling your friends it was ugly.

When you were 24 yrs old, she met your fiance and asked about your plans for the future.
You thanked her by glaring and growling, "Muuhh-ther, please!"

When you were 25 yrs old, she helped to pay for your wedding,
and she cried and told you how deeply she loved you.
You thanked her by moving halfway across the country.

When you were 30 yrs old, she called with some advice on the baby.
You thanked her by telling her, "Things are different now."

When you were 40, she called to remind you of a relative's birthday.
You thanked her by saying you were "really busy right now."

When you were 50, she fell ill and needed you to take care of her.
You thanked her by reading about the burden parents become to their children.

And then, one day, she quietly died.
And everything you never did came crashing down like thunder on your heart.
Never forget to love her more than ever if your mother is still around.
And if she's not, remember her unconditional love and pass it on.

Always remember to love thy mother, because you only have one mother in your lifetime!